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A decade ago, when Manly and I tied the knot, I was put on “the pill”. It seemed like a good idea because everybody else I knew was on it, so it must be great, right? Wrong! {Well, for me anyway. It may be fantastic for you. If so, rock on!} Out of nowhere, my naturally optimistic, happy self flew out the window and was replaced by a emotional train wreck with OCD.
My poor husband didn’t know what hit him! And, quite frankly, neither did I!
I had no clue what had taken over me, all I knew was that things couldn’t be clean enough and EVERYTHING had to be in it’s place or I couldn’t focus on ANYTHING else. I have no idea how to explain the loony tunes that were constantly playing in my head back then. All I can say is it was bad and honestly, not very fun. I desperately wanted to be my old self again, but I didn’t know how to find her nor how to kick my wacko alter-ego to the curb!
Flash forward 10 years and several hellions children later, we figured out that me and pills don’t mesh! It’s just not pretty! I giggle as I write this. Man, would that crazy girl go nuts if she could see me now! Yeah, I’m a clean girl by nature who was brought up by parents that put value in cleanliness, so we don’t live in a pigsty by any means, but, I’ve lost control of the clutter. I’ve lost the habits that come with organization.
What can I say? Life is a little hectic and I’m back to my old ADD fly by night self which maybe isn’t the best combination! {But boy, does it feel SO much better than that nut job did on the pill!}
When things don’t work, you’ve got to fixed them. So, after much thought I realized that this year’s life lesson was going to be about “ORDER”. Problem is, where do you start?
When I was struggling with something as a girl, my daddy would help me make a list. On it, we’d write down everything that wasn’t working and then on the other side of the page we’d write down what my goals were…what I wanted for myself. So, the other night I did just that and it helped me figure out my plan! Yes, I said P-L-A-N!
I’m horrible at planning, so this is a really good start for me!
I should get like 1000 imaginary points for that!
Anyway, the plan breaks down like this…
Each month, I’m going to focus on organizing one area of our home.
My “A-HA!” here was realizing that things don’t have to be perfect.
My organized spaces probably won’t be featured on I {Heart} Organizing and Jen won’t include my pictures in her organizing posts for The New Home EC.
I just don’t have the cash to go buy pretty shelving, gorgeous furniture, and awesome closet systems…someday…someday.
SEE!! That’s what has got me stuck the past few years! I would visualize and dream about what the space could be but then feel so frustrated that I didn’t have the big stuff, like I thought I needed, so I’d give up.
The thing to remember is that I am making things work for right now.
{One day when I have the gorgeous built in bookcases in my office, the lovely old pie hutch in my dining room, and the whitewashed cabinets in my laundry room, I’ll organize for that.}
But, for here and now, I’m going to make things do, and make things do well.
After all, I’m trying to “Establish a House of Order”…and fun.
There is no time for wishing we had what we don’t when there is fun to be had!
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| photo courtesy of: Prepared NOT Scared |
Like my friend, Hil, says “Present. I want to be present in the present, not thinking about the next thing to be done or the next project waiting for the next big thing.”
Madame Order, we don’t always agree, but like it or not, we’re going to be BFF’s this year. Better hang on to your label maker because this could be a bumpy ride.
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Love It . . . now if I could just figure it out in this crazy house! Same goals for the most part and really hoping that the resignation of my job is gonna help . . . but it’s already 19 days in to the new year and new start and not much has been accomplished. Guess we’ve got 12 days to get it done! Good Luck!! I can’t wait to see your accomplishments~
p.s. be glad for the OCD from that little pill ’cause it turned this crazy lady in to a mad woman. Increased my anxiety so badly that I dealt with “anger anxiety” . . . Yep, your sweet cousin would say to me while we were driving down the road, “you want to hit me, don’t you?” YEP . . . I SURE DID! No reason, No idea why, but sure wanted to. Sad thing is that was the ‘mini’ pill that’s not supposed to be as intensive. Sure would hate to see what the real thing would have turned me in to. Poor Dwight . . . he has certainly earned his sainthood many times. Gotta love these men of ours~ Sure glad they stick with us.
LOVE YOU!!
Yep, I know how you feel, me and any form of extra hormones is bad, bad news, none for me for a long time thanks
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